If She Gives Her Contact Info To Other Men She’s Looking To Replace You
Women who give their contact info to other men are looking for a new man.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who has been dating his girlfriend with the ultimate intent to marry. In the beginning they both agreed that giving out phone numbers, Instagram, etc., to other members of the opposite sex is not appropriate. However, lately she gives out her contact info to other men, sometimes without even being asked.
She now claims she gets along better with men than women. She also says she wants to meet others from the same ethnic background. He’s not buying it, but doesn’t want to appear insecure. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.
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This particular email from a viewer who says he’s been a fan for a while. He says he’s been dating this girl or his girlfriend for a while, and his intent is ultimately to get married, but obviously for you guys that are looking to get married and involve the government in your relationship, you got to make sure you vet properly for character.
What’s interesting is when these two started dating, they had a conversation about giving out contact information, Instagram, social media, those kinds of things, and they both agreed that would be inappropriate. If you’re in a relationship, you don’t do things like that. Now that they’ve been together for a while, I guess through the grapevine or mutual friends, he finds out that she basically gives out her Instagram and recently heard about her giving out her contact information, unprompted, to another guy that’s obviously not him. It’s not somebody that’s related to him, it’s just some random dude. Now she claims, “Oh, I want to meet other people from similar ethnic background,” because they’re just hard to find.
She also makes makes one of those red flag statements like, “Oh, I get along better with men than I do women.” Typically when you hear that, when you hear a woman that has nothing but guy friends and she doesn’t get along with girls, doesn’t have any close girlfriends, usually what’s happened in the past is there’s been a loyalty issue, and oftentimes it involves them trying to sleep with their girlfriends’ boyfriends because there’s just no loyalty. What happens is other women just don’t want to be friends with women like this because they’re just not good people.
Unfortunately, if you find yourself dating somebody, especially when you’ve had this conversation in the beginning, I don’t know how long they’ve been together for, but she’s given out her Instagram and her contact information to mostly other men, not girls, that she’s trying to become friends with. It’s mostly other men, and her excuse is, “Well, I get along better with dudes that I do girls.” Obviously he’s not happy because I don’t know how much time he’s got invested with this girl, but if he’s dating and vetting for marriage and this woman has given out her contact information, it’s pretty obvious for whatever reason, she’s not happy or he doesn’t do it for her or maybe he was doing it and he’s gotten sidetracked. The bottom line is, when you see behavior like this, it’s pretty much a deal breaker. This is not somebody you want to put a wedding ring on and definitely you don’t want to involve the state in your relationship because she ain’t loyal to anybody.
Viewer’s Email:
Hello Coach!
I have been a fan for a while and I really need your help here.
If I’m dating a girl with the intent of marriage and she supposedly has the same intent, would I be wrong in assuming that it is the respectful and appropriate thing for her to not give out her number or social media accounts to other men?
Yeah, that’s just common sense. It shouldn’t be a difficult thing if she wants you to put a ring on her finger. Yet she’s giving out her contact information to other men when you’re supposedly in an exclusive, monogamous, loyal relationship, then it’s pretty clear the reason she’s doing that, doesn’t matter what she says, there’s only one reason for a woman to do that. She’s looking for somebody else. She’s looking to replace you. She’s not completely happy or content in your relationship. These are not the actions of a loyal, famil-oriented woman. These are the actions of a woman who is trying to replace you.
It doesn’t matter what she says, because if a girl is like, “Oh, I have a boyfriend,” then the guy says, “Well, give me your number anyways,” and she gives it out and then she sleeps with him, she can go, “Well, it wasn’t my fault. Just kind of happened. I told him I had a boyfriend.” From that perspective, she absolves herself for any personal responsibility for the dude’s penis in and up inside of her. Again, a good, loyal, family-oriented woman who loves her dad, who respects her father, admires her father, looks up to her father, they have a good relationship, he’s loyal to his wife, his wife is loyal to him.
Girls that are raised in that kind of environment and actually respect their father, they respect his decision and his authority, they’re never going to do something like this. She’ll be highly, “I have a boyfriend. I’m sorry, I can’t,” and that’s the end of it. When they’re just willingly giving out their phone number and their social media, she’s basically saying she likes that particular guy. Even though she’s got a boyfriend, she’s probably disclosed it to these other guys. She doesn’t really give a shit. She doesn’t care how it looks. The bottom line is, it’s quite clear, at least through the grapevine, through the group of friends, it’s getting back to him. What’s going on when he’s not around? So he’s like, “I’m thinking about getting married,” and it’s like, this behavior is going on? Come on.
My girlfriend said she would give her Instagram to men from our ethnic background if she met them while she’s out with her friends as long as they don’t flirt with her.
That just sounds like a load of bullshit. “Hey, here’s a shit burger. Let me put some hot sauce on it, some Tabasco. Maybe a little barbecue sauce on it. Maybe some Heinz 57, A1 steak sauce. Little salt, little pepper. It’ll be great.” It’s still a shit burger, that’s the bottom line. As the Buddha said, “When somebody gives you a gift and you do not accept the gift, to whom does the gift belong?”
Her reasoning is that in her hometown, there aren’t many people from our ethnic background so she would want to expand her friend group.
Again, if she’s only exclusively giving out her number to dudes and not females, women from their ethnic group, she’s obviously full of shit.
She also has stated that she gets along better with men than women.
Yeah, because typically she displays disloyal behavior. She probably gives out her phone number to her girlfriends’ boyfriends. That’s probably happened so many times in the past that they just recognize she’s not somebody that has the character and the value system that they do, and they don’t want to be friends with her anymore. That’s what happens. It’s a red flag when a woman doesn’t have any girlfriends at all for any period of time and says, “Oh, I only get along with guys,” or “I get along better with men.” That’s because she’s too catty and disloyal, that’s why. Women with common sense don’t want to be friends with her.
My issue is this is a new feeling she has and we had stated early in the relationship that we see no reason to give our numbers or Instagram to people of the opposite gender. She said she would cut them off if they flirt with her or get the wrong idea.
Sounds nice, but the bottom line is you’re still giving out your phone number. If you’re in a relationship, there is no reason. What are you going to do, go hang out and have drinks one-on-one with this guy? “Oh, he’s just a friend.” No, that’s not going to happen. If a woman is trying to make male friends that are with guys that are single, that’s very clear she doesn’t really value loyalty, doesn’t value monogamy, doesn’t value exclusivity. Quite frankly, she don’t give a flying fuck what you think about it. She doesn’t care. She sees nothing wrong with it. This is why there are no women in her life. This is why she doesn’t have any female girlfriends, because again, she’s probably hit on all their boyfriends, and that’s why girls don’t want anything to do with her, at least for not very long until they get to know her.
She recently gave her Instagram to another guy voluntarily without him even asking while out with friends. Is she looking for attention from other men?
Not only is she looking for other attention, she’s looking for a fresh dick. That’s what she’s looking for. She don’t care. You had this conversation in the beginning, you set boundaries, you both agreed, and now she’s going back on that. So what does that mean? Her word doesn’t mean shit. It means nothing. Her commitment means nothing to you. If we look at her actions and bottom line her actions, she has no intent of honoring the commitment in the beginning. This is the type of girl, “Oops, it just happened. He ended up inside me. I’m totally innocent.” That’s what you get with women like this.
I don’t want to come off as insecure but I feel as though she’s being naive if she thinks giving her Instagram to other men isn’t giving them a hint.
Thank You,
Bob
She’s not naive. She’s doing it on purpose. She’s hoping that you’re naive, stupid, gullible and that you’ll just put up with it. Again, if she’s family oriented, if she grew up in a good, healthy family where mom and dad are together and they actually have a good relationship, not one where mom brow beats the dad into submission and nags his ass until he gives in and gives her what she wants. I’m talking a relationship with her parents where mom respects the dad, the other daughter respects the father, the sons respect the father, dad’s the ultimate man in the household, he actually acts like an alpha male and not some feminized beta male eunuch that put his balls in a box and gave them to his wife. Everybody respects him, especially the women in the family, because if the women in the family don’t respect dad, then girls raised by that father just don’t respect men in general.
So you have an agreement here, she’s going back on it, and now she’s expecting you just to swallow her bullshit explanation, just like, “Oh well, I get along better with men than women.” Well, of course you do, because they want to fuck you, that’s why. If she doesn’t have any female girlfriends, it’s because she’s not a good, loyal friend. That’s what that means. If she’s not a good, loyal friend, then she’s not a good, loyal girlfriend. You had this conversation in the beginning. She’s violating it, and this has happened on multiple occasions. This is not something new. This has been going on for some time and she’s like, “Oh, I want to make friends with other people of the same ethnic background.” Well, why is it that it is always exclusively dudes she’s trying to make friends with, but not women? Because she wants to fuck somebody else. She’s looking for the exits. She’s not loyal. Maybe she’s bored.
At the end of the day, there are people in this world that are liars and cheaters, and they think everybody else is the same way. If they’re not happy, they don’t see anything wrong with going and fucking somebody else, because hey, you got to live your truth, right? “Oh, I’m living my truth, man.” “Well, OK.” Fuck buddy, friends of benefits, sex playmate, not a girlfriend, not wife material. If I were you, I would definitely wear a condom. If your sole intention is to marry, I would deep six this girl and say, “Well, you’ve gone back on your word. It’s clear you’re not loyal. I don’t care what the excuse is. You don’t have any female girlfriends because every girlfriend you’ve ever had, you’ve probably tried to fuck their boyfriends or their husbands. That’s why no women want to be friends with you, because you’re not a good person.” She’s treating you the same way that’s caused other women not to want to be friends or that crap about, “Oh, I get along better with men. Girls are annoying.” That’s bullshit. It’s because she’s not a good person. Character is destiny. It’s not your fault that she’s like this. This is the fault of her parents.
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