Clueless Guy Stuck In Friend Zone While She Flirts With Other Men
What it means if you are stuck in friend zone while she flirts with other men.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a clueless guy who admits he only read 3% Man, Once. He is stuck in friend zone with a woman who openly flirts with other men while telling him the reason their romance is not progressing is because she likes to take things slow. He’s 35 and she’s a 41 year old single mom. He asks how to turn things around and progress the romance. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.
*Disclosure: This article contains affiliate links. An affiliate link means I may earn referral fees if you make a purchase through my link, without any extra cost to you. Thank you for your support.
Hi, I’m Coach Corey Wayne and this is my Video Coaching Newsletter. And the topic of today’s Members Only Newsletter is, “Clueless Guy Stuck In Friend Zone While She Flirts With Other Men.”
Well you know, it’s kind of interesting. It’s like towards the end of this email, this guy’s like, you know, I watch your videos all the time and I see these guys and I go, I think to myself, why don’t they just do what he says? It’s so obvious what to do. They’re being dumb. And he’s going, and I’m in the same situation. I can’t believe I’m in the same kind of situation as these guys. That he’s like yelling at the computer screen or the TV going, I can’t believe it’s so obvious what to do. But when you’re in it, when your emotions are heavily invested, it’s hard to do more things right than wrong with the ladies.
And so this particular guy, he’s 35, and he’s gotten all wrapped up in his mind with a 41 year old single mom, and I’m sure the Red Pill dudes are going, “oh, that’s your first problem.” It’s like it doesn’t really matter that she’s a single Mom. The point being is that he’s gotten himself into a friend zone with a woman that, like, they’re not kissing. They’re not hooking up, they’re hanging out. He’s probably spending money on her and doing things. And her excuse is, “oh, I just want to take things slow.”
Meanwhile, he sees her flirting with other guys, and he kind of acts as if she’s his girlfriend, even though there’s nothing going on between them two. So you’ve got to look at what a woman does, not what she says. And so one of the things that’s the issue here is this guy’s a shitty student. He read the book one time. And so as you go through the email, it’s like, I mean, he’s just doing things that the book says, do not do this because this is what happens. You get stuck in friend zone.
And he’s not listening. And he’s doing exactly the same things that he’s seen other guys do that he laughs at, and now he’s one of them. So you got to read the book 10 to 15 times. I mean, it’s free to read the Members Area of the Website. There’s no excuse for it, but most people major in minor things. That’s why the title of the book is “How to Be a 3% Man”, because most people are 97%’s. It’s just the way it is. As Wayne Dyer used to say, “it’s never crowded along the extra mile.”
Most people are not willing to do what’s required to get from where they are to where they want to be. And this guy should know better. But he’s a cherry picker, and he just can’t really see that because he’s all emotionally wrapped up, that he’s just spinning his wheels with somebody that quite frankly doesn’t really seem to give a shit. And it’s just using him as an emotional tampon and for entertainment. And he probably spends money on her and who knows what else he’s doing for her.
Viewer Email:
Hi Corey,
I have been watching your videos and I be honest I read your book only once.
This is what happens. Shitty students, you know, continue to have ridiculous problems like this that are easily avoidable.
I am in a situation where I am getting drained emotionally. I am 35 year old single man and she is 41. Five months ago I met this women who is single mom, we went on multiple dates and still meeting with each other. Actually we now live in the same building.
So I think he kind of moved into her building too, because it’s like, come on, dude.
We never had sex and even a nice passionate kiss from her side.
Bro, what’s the book say about that? You go out on a date, you go to kiss her, you get the cheek, you move on. Simple as that. Don’t date a structured woman or a woman with low interest. But because he had a fantasy that she’s the one or the ultimate woman for him, all that shit goes right out the fucking window. He completely ignores the fact this woman, again in five months, not even a fucking kiss. And yet he’s thinking, “oh yeah, I’m gonna keep trying.” So you say, “I got a chance.” If you ever saw the Dumb and Dumber with Jim Carrey and I forget the other guy, Jeff, whatever his name is.
Will give some idea of situation with this example. We were in a common party where she was about to introduce me to some of his friends but she left telling me she will back.
Probably to go get her back blown out by Chad Thunder Cock.
Late at night I called her three times she didn’t picked up.
You called three times. How many times you heard me say dating is like tennis? You hit the ball over the net. You wait for her to hit it back. You call, you leave a message. You wait for her to return the call. You don’t blow her phone up. You don’t multiple text, multiple phone call her. That makes you look needy, desperate, like a fucking beta male. But he did it anyways.
I was going to my apartment and I found her taking to someone regarding some Facebook group.
So he’s calling her, she’s ignoring him, not even taking his calls, and she’s probably looking at his phone going, man, this guy’s such a bitch.
She had such a behavior where she only giving me attention required to keep me hooked might be on bench but who spend three hours a day with someone just to keep them as an option.
Well, that’s your fault. The fact that you kept hanging out with her after you got the cheek, that’s all on you, dude. That’s just stupid.
I asked her to come with me she came to my flat. I asked her I need clarity.
What do you need clarity for? She’s not interested. You’re being used. If you act like a bitch, women will treat you like a bitch. It’s not because of her kid. It’s because she’s not attracted to you and you’re completely ignoring she’s making zero fucking effort. You’re chasing her around like a little puppy dog, “I need clarity.” You’re the gay male girlfriend. You’re the emotional tampon. You’re Captain Save-A-Hoe.
She said I already told you that she likes me and she is not dating another men at the moment.
But the reason it’s not going anywhere.
She also said that she takes things very slow that’s how she is may be because of her bad past experiences.
So this all sounds nice and logical, but you’re five fucking months in, dude, and you’re just, you’re spinning your wheels and you’re buying the bullshit. She’s not attracted to you. She doesn’t fucking care. That’s why you need to be dating other women. That’s why the book says to do this so you don’t get caught up. I mean, you’re 35 fucking years old. At some point, you got to grow the fuck up.
She offered to help many times but leaves in the middle for some Pickleball plan.
So in other words, she hangs out with you until Chad Thunder Cock becomes available. Or somebody that’s got something more exciting than hanging out with you going on. Never try to keep somebody who doesn’t want to keep you.
She has doing this since beginning.
Well, you completely ignored reality. And as Ayn Rand said, you can ignore reality, but you can’t ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. I can’t believe you got your head this far up your ass.
But she always showed up on dates.
In other words, you’re taking her out and you get a peck on the cheek and maybe a hug, but no kissy poo. “Oh, she likes to take it slow.” Well, how did she end up with a child? Give me a fucking break.
She told I am the very close to be the man she wanted in her life, but she still need time to know me.
It’s like, so I got a chance. Five months, I still haven’t got a kiss. I’m sure it’ll work out. He’s probably got friends. “Oh, she just needs time. You’ve got to be patient, Bob. It’ll work out. It’s meant to be. Just be patient. Keep doing things. Tell her how much you like her.” That’s probably what all the girls are. “Oh, tell her how much you care for her. And that you really like her. That’ll make all the difference.” Meanwhile, she disappears, goes, gets her back blown out by Chad Thunder Cock.
Also she told me that she likes flirty with other people and will continue that until she found man of his life.
Right there. It’s just basically, you’re not the man of her life. You’re a beta male orbiter, a gay male girlfriend, the dancing monkey, the guy that probably watches her kid when she’s out getting fucked by somebody else. But she likes to take things slow.
I disagreed to this but asked what she means by flirt to what extent or boundaries? And she said, just talking empathetic with others like she was doing at party, nothing more, which does not look like flirting.
Ah, sure. She’s talking to other man while ignoring you and playing with her hair and being flirty. And then you confront her about, oh, I wasn’t flirting. I was just having an empathetic conversation.
She always gives me explanation on things without asking. One incident I would like to discuss, specifically. There was a time we were not talking, and I was looking for flat in her area and suddenly I parked my car, and she was right there talking to her daughter. She was staring at me, when I looked at her, she trembled and turned around later she messaged me after two days.
Oh my God, he saw me. He probably was like, oh, she must have just overcome with her attraction towards me. My sexy body was turning her on. She was trembling. Oh my God, she probably thought you were a weirdo stalker.
I like spending time with her. But things are not moving.
Well, that’s why you go spend time with somebody where the things are moving.
Also I noticed she looks at other men with flirty look which is not normal.
That’s because she’s not into you.
What should I do coach? I have been watching newsletter where guys stuck in such situations and I thought why don’t they listen to you and now I am in a same situation myself, lol. Help me please. I am ready to cut her off my life if that’s required.
Thanks.
Bob
Well, if I were you, it’s like, come on man, read the fucking book. This is not going anywhere. Five months later, how much time? How much money? Now you’re living in her building. You probably moved there to be closer to her. You thought, oh, I’ll make it easier for us to be together by moving into her building. Yeah. That’s genius. Genius. Move if you act like a bitch, women will treat you like a bitch. Doesn’t matter whether they’re single mom or she’s raising a good family. If you act like a pussy, you ain’t gonna get no pussy. Simple as that. Act like a pussy. She’ll treat you like one and you won’t get any.
And so what I would do is never call her, or text her again for any reason. If she reaches out, just say, “hey, I’m down to hook up and make love. You don’t want to come over and do that. Then you probably should move on and find somebody else. Because I’m not. We’re not hanging out together unless we’re making love. That’s the only thing we haven’t done in five months is make love. And if you’re not down for that, then you should let me go. I’m going to move on. You do the same. If you ever change your mind and you want to get your freak on with me, I’d love to have you. If not, it’s been great. I enjoyed the five months together, but I’m out. This is not normal. I’m out of here.”
The strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it. So I would never spend time with her unless clearly up front, you’re like, she’s coming over to make dinner, and after dinner you guys are going to make love. And if she’s not excited about that, you’re not doing anything. And tell her I was like, “I’m done. I gave you five months. You don’t need to get to know me any better. If you’re not interested in sex and intimacy with me, then I don’t want to talk to you anymore. I want to move on with my life and find a woman that I can have a normal, healthy relationship with. And I wish you all the best.” And you got to stick to it. Because you’ve been caving and folding like a cheap fucking deck chair, bro. Have some self respect.
So, if you’ve got a question or a challenge and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen on any page, and book a coaching session with yours truly. Until next time, I will talk to you soon.
Click here to read this article on my website.