Angry Women Who Have Unreasonable Expectations
How to identify and avoid angry women who have unreasonable expectations and cause unnecessary drama.
In this video coaching newsletter, I discuss an email from a viewer who met a woman at a mutual friend’s wedding. She left early but gave his friend her number to give to him. He texted her several days later, made a date that went great and they hooked up. However, the very next day she got angry and broke it off with him, because she was being unreasonable and had expectations he didn’t know he was expected to meet.
My book brought out her worst side right away and saved him a lot of unnecessary drama. My comments are in bold italics like this below in the body of his email.
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If you’ve been following me for a while, then you know that I talk about my book, How To Be A 3% Man, and how the book, if you apply what it teaches, will bring out the best in the best women, and bring out the worst in the worst women. And so, what you’re going to see here is a success story.
What How To Be A 3% Man will help you to do is to separate the good women from the bad women, so you don’t get involved with the bad women that bring a lot of drama in your life. Because your life should be, like mine, a drama free zone.
Ninety-five percent of your happiness or your misery is going to come from the people you choose to have intimate relationships with. And if you make a bad choice like this guy, I mean, he really dodged a bullet, because this woman right away got really upset, really angry, really perturbed with him. She had some unreasonable expectations that she never mentioned to him. She just got mad and angry because that’s who she is.
And that’s what you want to find out as quickly as possible. You don’t want to be a month down the road and then find out she’s like this after you’ve already got strong feelings for her. Because it’s a lot harder to leave, to exit things which are several weeks or several months down the road before you find out what this person is really like.
Typically, it doesn’t get any better. You can try to set and enforce healthy boundaries, but if you’re dealing with somebody that’s incredibly insecure, and easy to anger, and easy to upset, no matter what you do, things are going to be going good, and then all of a sudden the other person is going to get mad and pissed off about some perceived infraction that you had no idea you were even doing. And once we go through this email, you’ll be like, “Damn!”
I’ve read 3% Man 13 times and I’m going to continue reading it over and over. Recently, I was at a wedding and a chick “bumped” into me and we hit it off.
When women literally physically bump into you, and touch you, lean against you, it’s communicating interest.
We went our separate ways after a brief conversation, and she left shortly thereafter. A week later, my friend who got married texts me her friend’s number, saying she wanted me to have it. I was busy that week, so I texted her 6 days later and we set up a date for this past weekend.
He’s busy. This is somebody new. I mean, obviously, if he if he was really super into this particular woman, he probably would have asked for the number. Or maybe he just figured, “Hey, the wedding just started. We’re going to be here for a while,” but for whatever reason she left shortly after they met, so he never got a chance to.
But the good news is, depending on how you look at it, she contacted him. She reached out to him, she pursued him through their mutual friend.
Throughout the week she’d text me to try and converse, and I’d keep it to a couple of texts and end the conversation on a positive note.
So, what you’re seeing here, and this is where a lot of guys go wrong, is they get in the process of stopping what they’re doing because they really like the girl, and start texting constantly. If you text too much, you turn her off and then she starts blowing you off. If you don’t text enough, but she’s easygoing, easy to get along with, she’s like, “Oh, he’s busy. I’m sure he’ll get back to me when he’s got time.”
Women who are raised in healthy families and got enough hugs as a kid aren’t going to be bothered by this, but women that are insecure, didn’t get enough strokes as a kid, are going to get upset, which you’ll see in a minute.
Friday comes and we get to the bowling alley, and she gives me a really tight hug. Throughout the night we had a blast. We laughed, she would touch me a lot, and I would reciprocate, she made sexual innuendo and I’d laugh and tease her for being a naughty girl. During frame 6, she asks “Do you live close??
Gee, I wonder why she’d bring that up. She’s basically saying, “Hey, do you live close, so we can go back to your place and fuck?” That’s her tactful way of implying that she’s interested.
I said “Yeah,” and gave her a smile, and she giggled like a schoolgirl.
Being very feminine, very submissive. Because the sexual act is a submissive act for a woman. She literally gets dominated by the man… hopefully.
After the game we went back to my place, and I was on my game. Two steps forward and one step back for a couple of hours until we performed the indoor Olympics!
Well, congratulations. Hope you got a gold medal.
At one point we were making out and she was giggling saying, “I feel like I’m in high school again!”
In other words, her emotions are all over the place. She’s really liking him.
It was a great night! Best first date I’ve ever been on. She leaves, and I went to spend the night at my parent’s house because I take care of them and they needed help in the morning.
So, he’s a good son.
The next morning comes and the chick texts saying she left her necklace at my place and asked if she can get it soon.
Huh, imagine that — a woman leaving something at your house, marking her territory, also giving her a reason to reach back out in the future.
I said yes and sent her a bowling meme. Here’s where it all got crazy.
She replied saying it’s not going to work out and that we’re looking for different things because I didn’t text her at night to see if she got home safe.
So, now everything seems good. She’s calm, cool, collected right up until this point, and she basically loses her shit on him. He’s thinking, “Hey, we had a good time. This is great, a lot of fun, easygoing, easy to get along with,” and now her insecurities are getting the best of her. So, her worst side is coming out now.
This is what happens with a woman that doesn’t get enough hugs as a kid. The same thing happens with guys. They didn’t get enough strokes, their self-esteem is in the toilet, or maybe they grew up in a family where everybody’s self-esteem was in the toilet, and they pass it on to their kids. And so, when you really want something and you think you’re not going to get it, you tend to react not too well.
Context: When she left my place, I walked her to her car, kissed her goodbye, we both said “be safe” at the same time, and she said “jinx.”
So, basically, they said it at the same time. Everything seems like, “Wow, this is a great girl. Everything is going awesome,” right?
She was adamant that I was rude and that she traveled super far to see me, (50 minutes), and it’s the least I could do.
How is he supposed to know this? Is he supposed to be psychic? If it was me, I would have said, “How come you didn’t text me if you wanted to talk? If it was that important to you, how am I supposed to know this? I’m not psychic.” That’s how I’d respond.
And I would also say, “You know what, you’re being silly and you’re being unreasonable,” because she is. You’ve got to call her out on her bullshit, and that’s the right way to handle it. It’s like, “You’re being silly and unreasonable. We just met. I went over to my parents’ house to stay the night there and take care of them, and you’re mad at me? That’s ridiculous. We don’t even know each other.”
She also mentioned she didn’t like that I didn’t “check in” on her throughout the week, aka didn’t text her.
Even though she was texting him throughout the week, constantly pursuing him. Now, a woman with a healthy self-esteem, she might have felt these feelings, but she’s not going to get upset and blow the whole thing up over it. So, she’s basically got the attitude of “I’m mad. I’m leaving the sandbox. I’m taking my toys, and I’m going home. I don’t want to play with you anymore. You’re a big meanie!”
That’s one date. One date, and this chick is losing her shit. Can you imagine trying to have a relationship with somebody like this? “Ugh, you’re ten minutes late! Ugh, you weren’t home when you said you’re going to be! Ugh, you left the toilet seat up! Ugh, you left the dishes in the sink! Ugh, I can’t believe it! That’s it, I’m breaking up with you!”
You know, she’s probably the type of person that her way of trying to get the man to do what she wants is to threaten to end the relationship. And statistically, that’s going to give you, I think it’s like, a 95% chance that the relationship won’t work out, because eventually you’re going to get sick of the bullshit.
And what’s great about this is this was one date. Can you imagine a guy dates her for two months, and say he did text her throughout the week, and he did text her that night, “Hey, did you get home safe?” or whatever? I mean, she should have texted him that she got home safe. But she’s pissed off at him.
But say he would have called or texted more with her, he would have known that she was like this. He could have gone a month, a month and a half, maybe got into a serious relationship with her. And then, as soon as he felt comfortable in the relationship he would have backed off, and then she would have started getting pissed off and caused drama with him all the time.
He’s thinking, “Who is this girl?” But because he followed what’s in “How To Be A 3% Man,” she went full lunatic on him after one date. But hey, why buy the cow? Because he got the milk for free.
I surmised that she is a woman who is full of herself, God’s gift to the world type of woman.
No, she’s just insecure. She didn’t get enough strokes as a kid. That’s what happened. She’s got self-esteem issues, and you know what, that’s her problem, not your problem. The book worked as designed, because your life is a drama free zone.
When she came to pick up her necklace, she said “You’re the only guy to not text me at night to check in on me or the next morning to tell me you had a good time.” The other night she also said, “I’ve never met a guy like you!” while making out.
So, she probably dates a lot of weak beta males and they over-text her, and then she probably blows them off, and jerks them around, and then blames them for it and say it’s all their fault. “Oh, there’s no chemistry, there’s no spark. I’m not feeling anything.” Or ghost them. And so, this ruffled up her feathers. It roughed up her ego.
Suffice to say, we aren’t seeing each other anymore. After reflecting, I am happy with how I showed up and the experience of the night.
Well, I don’t know what else he said to her, but I would have said, “Your behavior is inappropriate. You’re totally coming unglued. You have unreasonable expectations. If you wanted to talk to me, you should have called. You should have texted me. I would have been happy to hear from you. But to just get mad and upset and butt-hurt and then be mad at me and say, ‘This is it. I’m going my separate way!’ That’s immature, and I just don’t have time for that bullshit.”
“You should be apologizing to me for overreacting and trying to cause drama, because my life is a drama free zone. If you want to continue seeing me, you’re going to be easygoing and easy to get along with. And if that’s too tough for you, then obviously I’m not the guy for you. You should call some of those other soft men that you like to spend time with.”
It was a wild wave of emotions for me, but I could hear you saying “my work brings the best out of the best and the worst out of the worst!”
Good for you, dude. Good fucking job. I know it’s hard, because I’m sure you really liked her, but she went full lunatic.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this type of woman and feedback on my game.
Well, all I have to say is mission accomplished, bro. There’s no downside here. You had a good time. Hopefully, you wore a raincoat, even though that’s not always a guarantee that you’re not going to get a gift that keeps on giving. So, choose wisely, padawan.
So, if this is your first video you’ve seen of mine, I encourage you to read “How To Be A 3% Man” for free at UnderstandingRelationships.com. Also “Mastering Yourself” and my third book, “Quotes, Ruminations & Contemplations.” So, you can read all three, all you have to do is subscribe to the email newsletter.
And if you’ve got a question or a challenge in your personal or your professional life and you’d like to get my help, go to UnderstandingRelationships.com, click the Products tab at the top of your screen and book a coaching session with yours truly.
“The best relationships are with people who are easygoing and easy to get along with. People who are uptight, have unreasonable expectations and are quick to anger over silly things should be avoided, unless you want to have a life full of unnecessary drama. People tend to project what’s inside of them and what they feel onto other people in order to disassociate from their flaws and faults. If you meet someone new and they get perturbed and butt-hurt very easily, it’s always best to give them the gift of missing you permanently.” ~ Coach Corey Wayne